far as the East is from the West

My biggest fear is to not have or be enough; not enough food, not enough money, not being prepared enough, or not doing enough in life. I try to fill my “plate of life” up with more to satisfy that word “enough”.

But what does “enough” actually mean? According to the Merriam-Webster diction, “Enough (adjective): occurring in such quantity, quality, or scope as to fully meet demands, needs, or expectations”. 

So as I am reading this definition I begin to ask what does it mean to meet demands? What are the demands? Who is demanding this? Who actually came up with the word demand? I then have to stop myself because at this point none of my questions are going in any direction and I find that Google does not have all the answers.

I am the type of person who want to make sure my needs are always met – needs meaning shelter, finances, and food. I have allowed myself to blend my needs and wants so much so that I am living in excess. In saying this I mean that I blind myself from looking at houses that fit the job but do not fit my standard of “cuteness” (basically Pinterest everything). I try to bring a snack with me wherever I go just in case I get hungry – which is not a bad thing, but I have almost convinced myself that I cannot feel hunger pains.

***Even as I am writing this I want to delete it all because I do not want people to view me as the person who does not have it all together, the person who is always enough by her own doing.***

I am still learning what being enough means to me and most importantly what it means to my Father. He always provides for me. I am always enough for Him. He knows so much more about what I am doing and what I am going to do that I do not have to worry. I am reminded by this verse in Luke where it says, “Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows.” (Luke 12:7). The fact that someone would care so deeply about you and me that they know the number of hairs on our heads is mind-boggling. 

Just when I begin to feel so overwhelmed with my “plate of life” being so filled, I know that I can rest in Him. Even when I continually push Him away because I think ‘oh, this is not that much work, I can do it by myself’. I don’t think He only wants to be invited into things that are big or “more than you can handle”. He wants to be in EVERYTHING. He wants to qualify you to be enough. 

To meet the demands is to follow Him and invite Him into everything. He only demands you to love on others, but most importantly fix your eyes on Him. He doesn’t demand more of you than possible. He created the word demand.

Learning to be enough is tricky. When I look around at what the world is doing I FEEL defeated, unqualified, unworthy, not good enough. When I rest in Him I KNOW that I am a conqueror, qualified, worthy, enough. Knowing and doing are to different things, that is why I am choosing to know who I am first then I do.

Join me in being enough.